Thursday, April 19, 2012

'A nice flight' is a myth

What is the first thing that comes to your mind when you hear the word 'plane'? Zooming around in the sky? or Meeting the hottest air-hostess?

Well, in my opinion, Air-travel couldn't be more over-rated! Why, you ask? Here, I give you 10 reasons why planes simply suck!

10. People think they are smarter. Seriously. You will always find one guy who wants to monitor everyone's overhead luggage and readjust it just so he could establish his 'flight-experience' :-/ Funnier enough, you find people mark their territories in sections of the flight THEY take care of. How about, help when you are asked to and let the flight-staff do their work, moron!

9. You can barely be comfortable for the entire duration of the flight + the time of boarding / take off. The seats are NOT recliners and the pillow is a joke. Blankets make you itchy (not warm) and the neck-rest reaches the top of my head :S

8. Everything is sub-standard. Their wi-fi, their card-readers, their shopping catalogs, their beer! and yet, they term it being 'world-class' just because its up-in-the-air! Plus, you can almost always fall. Doesn't that scare the shit out of you?!

7. Whats with frustrated air-hostesses?

6. The screens are faulty, the earphones might make you deaf, telecast is fluctuating /eye-hurting, the collection of programs plain sucks and the movies are SO edited that you can't make head-or-tail out of it.

5. A smile costs a million dollars! No-one even thanks the flight-staff anymore and there is an uproar even if the flight is 30 seconds late.

4. You are expected to dress well. Especially if you belong to the feminine gender. Your baggage is judged, your hair, the brand of your clothes, shoes, even the book that you read matters! It defines you and whether you are speak-worthy or not.

3. Every seat has its advantages / disadvantages. If you sit on the window, you need to scream everytime the air-hostess asks you something.. and if you sit at aisle, you need to get up everytime your fellow passenger feels like. You can't just let them slide, there is no leg-room anyway.

2. Plane food is ass. There, i said it.

1. EVERYONE farts in a plane! Courtesy the food of course. As the journey progresses, the air in the plane starts feeling funny, if you notice.. and if they have served beef jerky, even god can't save you.

Trains are slower but they are the better means to travel any day. If only we could practically slide all continents and stick them to each other! Sigh!

P.S. I realize that this post makes me sound like a super-brat. But, if I pay $800-$1000 for a service, I better get an efficient one.

P.S.S. Like you figured, I traveled a lot in the last few months. Made some life defining decisions and some heart-breaking ones. Updates follow, soon :)


Atrocious Scribblings said...

Its either all of this or you just got yourself a ticket on a crappy airline.

The over smart co-passengers, farts and the sucky airline food are universal though.

Express said...

Nope, post isnt based on 1 journey no. and i had a few points that werent universal, so i cut them out.

i really hate plane travel. The only thing that can make it survivable is pleasant company and THAT, is rare.

Priyanka Mehta said...

I couldn't agree more with this post!
Almost all detestable points covered!
Hoping to hear from you soon on the decisions you've made!

Confused Soul said...

Aaah the only advantage traveling in a plane is the time in which you reach your destination and that's about it. Otherwise I'd prefer the trains any day!

phatichar said...

Hehehehe.. :)

Rahul Bhatia said...

Very interesting and true observations:)

♫♪♥PhilO♥♪♫ said...

People will never stop judging, wherever you may go :)

Zeba said...

Woah. Buhahahaha

jnana said...

This is true, but for some reason I love flights despite all the millions of uncomfortable things we have to go through.

Nidhi said...

Haha...nice post!!! I love to travel by train any is such an amazing experience getting to know people around you...sharing your food...haggling with the vendors..bliss! :)
As someone already said..if its not for the time saved...I would prefer train over plane any day!

Sach! said...

Oh man why did I not read this before. I am laughing crazily. :)
I really want to discuss on this soon !!!

Zeba said...

Arey. No new posts?